A republican, a libertarian and a democrat were having lunch in a family restaurant one winter day when a bum with long hair and a scraggly beard came in and sat down at a corner table. The waitress walked by him several times, ignoring him, “Excuse me," asked the conservative to his waitress, “but why are you ignoring that man?”
“Oh, he’s one of the local homeless,” replied the waitress. “He has no money and never orders anything, but the boss let’s him come in to get warm.”
“Well, get him some soup and a sandwich and put it on my bill,” instructed the republican.
“And something to drink. Some milk perhaps,” chimed in the libertarian. 
“And pie for dessert,” offered the liberal. “I’ll cover that.”
So the waitress brought all the food over to the homeless one, who ate heartily of it. When he was finished the homeless man came over to his benefactors and said, “I am Jesus, the Christ. You have given me food when I am hungry and drink for my thirst. I will reward for this.” He placed his hand on the republican and said, “You have arthritis. It is gone and shall never bother you again.”
Next he turned to the libertarian and placed his hand upon him. “You have migraine headaches. Never again will you suffer from any headache.” 
Finally he turned to the democrat.
“DON’T TOUCH ME!” screamed the democrat.
“I’M ON DISABILITY!”
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